Friday is garbage pick-up day. Friday is the end of the work week. Friday is anticipation for the weekend. Friday is the end and the beginning. Friday is somewhat unique in our society.
Of course, I don’t go to a job away from home. I have a full plate right here. But, I still love Fridays. For me, it’s like a mini New Year’s Eve and it happens every week! So, I make Friday evening a very special time for myself.
Once the family has settled down, I have a tendency to flop down in my big easy chair with my personal gratitude journal. I read everything I have written during the week. It’s not that I think I’m such a great writer, but it does give me time to reflect on the week. I look at all the things for which I have offered my gratitude since the last Friday. Then, I “read between the lines.” I think of all the things for which I am truly grateful that didn’t make the journal. I try to catch up by offering a statement of gratitude for each of my new thoughts.
But, the real benefit of reading the gratitude journal on Friday evenings is that I can reflect on things I could have done that I somehow overlooked or avoided. I think back over events that with a little effort on my part could have been real gratitude experiences.
Just as an example, I have written this week that I am thankful for Mrs. Hildebrand. But, even with my gratitude for her, I felt a little hole in my heart. By writing about her, I realized that while she is quite a character, it is obvious that she is lonely. With that knowledge I did nothing this week to help alleviate her loneliness. I didn’t make a special effort to visit her.
I’m not going to take you on a guilt trip. In fact, I’m not going on one. I packed the last of my guilt trip luggage in 1973. I threw the baggage out on Christmas day of that year. That was when I realized that feeling guilty for something I had done or had not served no real purpose in my life. Guilt trips are somewhat like worrying. You can either do something about it or you can’t. You know the rest. If you can do something about it, you do it. If you can’t, you let it go.
I remember Christmas 1973 all too well. I thought I had taken control of my life… that means my inner thoughts… but I had not. I allowed a few family members to take my mind and lead me right down the broad road that led me straight into a guilt trip. By the time the family had left I was so damned depressed and down on myself that I went to bed without washing the dishes or putting away the lace table cloth. I stayed in bed until almost noon the next day. I wasn’t asleep although I tried to convince myself that I was. Instead, I felt the festering blisters from the walk down memory lane to the gates of Guilt. That’s when I realized that I didn’t want to open the gates and enter.
I remember getting up, taking out my gratitude journal and reading. 1973 had been a pretty good year. I had lots to be thankful for and I had expressed my gratitude everyday. With that in mind, I decided that one day (Christmas Day) was not going to ruin a year of gratitude. I began to feel good about my life. That was the moment I got into the flow of the universe.
Now, back to Mrs. Hildebrand. As I read back over the week, I have been so very thankful for so many things that have been provided. And, I suppose I could feel a little guilty about not having visited Mrs. Hildebrand. What would that feeling serve? Not a thing. The alternative is to do something about it.
Of course, it’s not Friday evening yet, but I have already begun thinking about doing something about the hole in my heart. One thing I have noticed about Mrs. Hildebrand is that when she does come outside, someone is always beside her as she makes her way down the steps onto the sidewalk. It has occurred to me that while all the neighbors have repeatedly invited the older woman to our outings, none have gone to her house to get her, to help her down the steps.
Tomorrow is cookout day at my house. Happy is still picking fresh vegetables from her garden. Mattie is baking my favorite caramel cake. I have already set up the tables for dominoes and cribbage. The steaks are in the refrigerator. Everything is pretty well set up and ready to go fo tomorrow.
I have called Mrs. Hildebrand and invited her to the cookout. Of course, she refused at first. But, I somewhat insisted, saying that I would be at her house at noon to help her down the steps and bring her to my house. Just saying that I would help her down her front steps seemed to change her attitude… and her response. Dear old Mrs. Hildebrand will be ready at 11:45 a.m.
The idea of the day seems to be that while we are all grateful for so much abundance, when we look back on events, perhaps we should not be so quick to judge others. Perhaps, we should look a little deeper into ourselves and into the events. All Mrs. Hildebrand needed was for someone to help her down the steps. I know that is such a little thing. And, I know Mrs. Hildebrand could have said, “I can’t get down the steps” and sure enough someone would have been there to help her. But, she didn’t.
Looking back over last week’s gratitudes made me think, made me search for a way to create more gratitude. It’s nothing more than helping the widow down her front steps.
Gratitude is a way of counting our blessings. But, with careful thought and a little reflection, our gratitude journals can also teach us and lead us to more gratitude. I suggest that each of us spend a little time reflecting on those things for which we are grateful. Hidden within our gratitude is a path to greater gratitude and better life experiences. Look for yours.
